40 Things I Learned in 40 Years
Asha Wilkerson Birthday Photo for the blog post 40 Things I Learned in 40 Years


Hey Y’all!

I just turned 40 and let me tell you, it was quite the celebration. My dad, 10+ years back told me that he was only going to celebrate his birthday every 5 years, since each 5 years is a milestone.

I liked that idea, but flipped it and said I’m really going to celebrate every 5 years…big party, hire a DJ, take up space and celebrate me!

Well, this year I did just that, same as I did when I turned 30 and 35 and let me tell you, it’s well worth it.

Party aside, I always like to look back at what I’ve learned and I created this list of 40 lessons I’ve learned in my 40 years on earth.

Here it goes:

  1. Figure out who you are over and over again. You’ll be a new person at every stage.
  2. Pivot and pivot again.
  3. Take your time.
  4. But time is of the essence.
  5. Get comfortable disappointing people, you can’t please them all anyway.
  6. Learn how to love yourself. Not say to indulge yourself, but really how to love yourself.
  7. After a while, it’s not what you know, it’s who you know.
  8. Prioritize relationships with the right people over money and things.
  9. Nothing stays the same, embrace change.
  10. Gratitude is a game changer. Practice it every day.
  11. Move your body. Don’t stop moving. A body in motion stays in motion.
  12. Read books. There are a million ways to consume information these days, but books still hold magic.
  13. Travel as often as you can. Traveling the world has shaped me and taught me more lessons than any classroom ever did.
  14. Take risks. No risk, no reward.
  15. Don’t be afraid to fail. Failure is a part of the process and there’s only shame if you let shame creep in.
  16. Work on healing your past relationships. Start with your parents and then move forward.
  17. You can’t outrun the things you need to heal from. Take the time now to address them or they will chase you for the rest of your life.
  18. Practice celebrating your wins, both big and small. The momentum of celebration will help you keep going.
  19. There are no mistakes, just lesson.
  20. Be quick to compassion for yourself and others.
  21. Figure out a way to pursue your passions, whether it’s full time or part time, do it.
  22. Learn how to express yourself in ways that are helpful to you and others.
  23. Pick your values and live them out loud.
  24. Let people be who they want to be, you get to make the choice to stick around or not.
  25. Don’t be afraid to get hurt. You’ve been hurt before, you’ll be hurt again, and you’ve always recovered.
  26. Gratitude changes things, mainly the way you see things. Practice gratitude and watch your life change.
  27. Don’t confuse unfamiliar with uncomfortable. The two are different, very different but if we’re not paying attention, we’ll think they’re the same thing.
  28. Treat yourself just as good as you treat everybody else. There’s no need to put yourself last.
  29. If you’re stuck, it’s because you’re not thinking big enough. If you open your mind enough, you’ll find a way.
  30. Be resilient. Life is going to life and things will knock you down. Practicing getting back up and trying again.
  31. Chase your dreams like it’s the last chance you’ll ever get. Nobody has ever regretted going for it, but so many people regret not trying.
  32. But also, be careful who you tell your dreams to. Not everybody will understand, but that’s ok, because they’re not the one who gave them to you.
  33. Figure out what self care is for you. The goal is to pour back into yourself as much as you pour out into others and it looks different for everyone.
  34. Trust your intuition. Your instincts are probably spot on.
  35. Stay curious and never stop learning.
  36. Learn to ask expansive questions, questions that invite opportunity and exploration.
  37. Learn the difference between your comfort zone and your familiar zone. Chances are you aren’t really all that comfortable anyway.
  38. Being “triggered” by other people is just a mirror for what you need to heal in yourself. Pay attention.
  39. Emotions are just energy in motion. Let them come, let them go, but whatever you don’t let them get stuck inside you.
  40. Go live your life. Give it your best shot. Try, fail, and try again. Make memories and fall in love with the journey!

Are there any lessons you’d add to this list? Let me know in the comments!

Cheers to Forty Years!



Ep 14 Have You Asked Yourself What You Really Want Lately?

Ep 14 Have You Asked Yourself What You Really Want Lately?

Join Asha Wilkerson as she delves into the importance of knowing and pursuing your deepest desires. Through real-life client success stories, Asha explores how uncovering and expanding your vision for what you want in life can lead to profound personal growth and fulfillment. If you’re ready to break free from old patterns and discover what truly lights you up, this episode is for you.

EP 12 Clarity Comes from Action, Not Thought

Podcast: Clarity Comes from Action, Not Thought

“Clarity Comes from Action, Not Thoughts” shows you how to break free from analysis paralysis and start living your dream life. If you’re ready to take the next step towards clarity and fulfillment, this podcast is your guide to unlocking your full potential and creating the life you desire.

Join the Email List

You’ll never miss a post when they’re delivered right to your inbox.

Are you ready to shake the chains of expectations and live in your own power, light, and love? It’s time to join the email list and unlock your potential!  Don’t wait any longer to achieve your goals and chase your dreams. Remember, you have the power to create the life you desire, and it all starts now!